Fickle Faith

I was reading earlier today and came across a verse that really stuck out to me in John 2

²³ Now while he was in Jerusalem at the Passover Feast, many people saw the miraculous signs he was doing and believed in his name. ²⁴ But Jesus would not entrust himself to them, for he knew all men. ²⁵ He did not need man's testimony about man, for he knew what was in a man.

Jesus just turned water into wine, people are seeing the miraculous signs he's doing and believing in him. That's what he wanted right - people to believe in Jesus? Apparently not. At least not that kind of belief.

It appears that people were believing in what Jesus was doing, not who He was. They were impressed with the miracles, but not with the fact that God himself was standing before them. We have a tendency to be impressed with people's actions so much so that we overlook their character. We have sports "heroes" who are great athletes but, who they are, their character is nothing to be admired (Michael Vick, Mike Tyson, Allen Iverson, OJ Simpson, Pete Rose, Darrell Strawberry, Rae Carruth, and on and on) It's the same in business, education, or any area - people who seem to excel in their abilities but have huge character flaws in who they are.

Jesus wasn't interested in putting on a show, in winning the accolades and approval of an adoring crowd. Why? Scripture says because he "did not need man's testimony, for he knew what was in a man." He knows how we are, how we think, how fickle our faith is.

Consider this for a minute: when it seems to you like God isn't listening, isn't answering and isn't doing anything in your life - how's your faith? Strong? Weak? Questioning? Fading? How about when it seems like God is actually working against you, how's your faith then? We have this problem of substituting our faith in Christ for our faith in his ability. We forget who He is. He is God. He is not our "do-boy" and what He does and doesn't choose to do for us does NOT change who He is. He is God. He is praiseworthy. He is holy. He is righteous. And I we are not.

Talk about a fickle faith. How's yours today?

Faithful

My life is by no stretch of the imagination something to be considered difficult when compared to the suffering and trials of so many others. And still, there are times when you just feel like everything is falling apart and you question whether or not you're really doing what you're supposed to be doing or are at the right place or just wonder - "why me?" The last few days have been that kind of time for me.

• We found out a good friend of ours is planning on getting a divorce because "we never should have gotten married in the first place" Huh? It's a little too late for that now. Especially when you're a believer and know what God's design for marriage is. Like John says in Marley and Me - "mend it don't end it!"
• Other marriage issues include unmarried women shacking up with married guys while claiming to be a believer but being completely unrepentant, teenage couples with no means of support, no plan and disapproving families planning on getting married, and then there's always the unmarrieds who are having sex and living together. We think that's so common now some people say it's normal or ok. Wrong again.
• Our air conditioner breaks
• Close friends who have lost their job just told us they may now have to move away from here and a great support system because they don't have the finances to be able to stay while they figure things out
• We've got "sexting" issues we're having to deal with (and some parents are more upset that we're dealing with it than that it's going on in the first place)
• Our Family Pastor (Claude's) brother had a heart attack yesterday and is on life support. Claude and his wife flew down early this morning.
• My laptop died so I have to start over (and am not mobile) in preparing for this weeks message, for worship and other things. (EDIT: I fixed it - or at least I got it working)
• We found out that our kids are going to be dropped from insurance starting Sept 1st - only going to cost an extra $900 a month unless we can figure something else out.
• And then there's so-called "customer service" - Lora has a ring - it's been repaired once and supposedly rebuilt the second time (within a year) and after 4 months, they seem to think it's natural wear and tear that stones are loose again. I'm not done with them yet but don't recommend them. Had phone and internet issues too and problems still aren't resolved.

Well that's enough to give you a pretty good idea of what's going on. And yet, with all this turmoil, I'm reminded that my marriage is strong, my kids are healthy, our family is safe, I'm employed, Christ is still on the throne AND He hasn't ever left me. he knows my name, my troubles and my heart. And He deserves praise and honor -whether things are going well or not. Why? Because He's faithful.

So how's your week been?

All You Can Do

I had an experience recently where I finally realized something and so I figured I'd share. After all, it's taken me 37 years to figure it out, so here goes.

All of us have friends or family that we have spent considerable time with and invested a lot of hours in - trying to help them through problems, supporting them, teaching them and praying for them. I started doing that before I ever had kids of my own when I was a youth pastor. Now that I've got five of my own, I continue to pour into the people I love. It's tiring, but can also be rewarding when you see someone implementing some of the Godly wisdom you've tried to impart in them - telling the truth, making tough choices, etc.

Well, it has always bothered me on a personal level when I've seen former students of mine, who I spent considerable time with and who allowed me privileged access into their worlds, who have taken a different path then the one I tried to show them and encourage them along. I've felt like a failure (even now that I'm a pastor I often feel the same way). I feel like I didn't do a good job. Girls got pregnant, guys have abandoned the faith, some to the point of calling themselves atheists, kids have run away from home or moved out, others have quit school or moved in (often with their newest boyfriend/girlfriend), even now, people insist on divorce as the best option or fornication as an acceptable alternative.

So whenever I would catch up with a former student, I'd prepare myself to feel the tinge of failure yet again. It certainly didn't always happen - some students are in ministry, some preparing for it, and others are married and making an amazing life with their spouse and kids as they follow after Christ.

Recently I felt that failure again. I saw a former student - one who was now a single parent - and was looking through some pictures she had. Some of the pictures were from when she was in my youth group, on trips with myself and others. As I looked, I came across a picture that would normally send my home with my tail between my legs, wondering who was I to think I could make a difference in someone's life. Of the 6 or 7 girls pictured, there was only 1 who I knew to be living out her Christian faith. Two were single, unwed mothers, two were married, (one to a divorced unbeliever, the other also to an unbeliever) and the rest had strained relationships with their parents or others (one is currently living, and most likely sleeping, with her fiance). Normally I'd be crushed.

But this time was different. I've spoken with these girls since they graduated and moved on - most everyone admits they know better - they just haven't chosen to do better. And so I realized that I gave them every advantage, every tool and every reason I could, to choose the path of obedience and blessing, but THEY chose otherwise. I did what I could (and most of the their parents did as well) but still, despite the right teaching, the clear biblical guidelines, still THEY chose unwisely. And now many of them are paying the price with strained relationships and difficult circumstances that I'll simply call consequences for sin.

Me, I don't feel guilty this time. I don't feel like a failure. In fact, I rejoice with the one in the picture who chose wisely and is living in the blessing of God's unending grace. I see her joy, I know her family, I've held her children. Her life hasn't been easy, but it's been blessed. And it's because she chose to follow God's path, no matter how hard it's gotten. And God's been faithful to her as she's been faithful to Him. So Laci, thanks for being an encouragement to me and helping me to realize that all we can do is show people what's right and then pray for them to live righteously. You are a testimony - keep living right. We both know you're not perfect, but at least you're trying. Thanks.

For the rest of you - don't look at the choices that other people make as your failures. You can't own their decisions anymore than you can make them for them. When you've presented truth, when you've shared the way, do it with love, with conviction, with concern, but remember, at the end of the day, that's all you can do (besides praying for them of course). We can't make our children choose right - but I'm committed to letting them know and be clear on what IS right - and that's all I can do.

Help "If" You Can

So this morning I dropped my wife off so she could head to a pastor's wives retreat for a few days. I think everybody needs a break and a time to recharge. This is one of hers. Me, on the other hand, am going to be flying solo with all five kids. I've got plenty that needs to get done, but I'm not stressing. Why? Because I've got a few people who have said they'll help.

Right now, Randy and Laci Strickland are hanging with my kids and swimming in the pool. Later, another friend is coming by because I've got a presentation/meeting tonight. Tomorrow, another friend has offered to take all 5 of mine for a few hours and feed em lunch and then that night, yet another will be coming over to hang out because I have a counseling appointment. Next day, yep, more friends coming over to help and hang out.

Here's the point. I'm feeling totally blessed and cared for right now because some people asked if there was anything they could do to help and when I said "yes" they said "ok". It really should be that simple. It doesn't have to be anything extravagant. Just pay attention to what's going on around you. Maybe you can fix cars, cook a meal, trim trees, mow grass, pick up groceries, take pictures, paint, do small home repairs, clean, heck, even pay a bill for someone. It's not really a question of IF as much as it's a question of WHEN. We can all help, it's just that too many of us usually don't because we either think the "little" thing we'd do wouldn't help much anyhow, or we just don't feel like it.

I'm telling you - any little bit helps - and you can help....try it at least once today.

The F-word (part 3)

Some people may be wondering what to do when people seem to follow the steps or meet the conditions of forgiveness but it doesn't seem genuine. It seems like they're pretending just to make things right. Even then it's only temporary because it's only a matter of time before they do the very same thing again and the whole cycle continues: they sin, then say, "I repent," you say, "I forgive you," they sin again, feel bad and so they say, "I repent," you say, "I forgive you," and on and on it goes, ad infinitum. This can't be right can it?

This kind of forgiveness reeks of "pretending" and seems disingenuous at best. I'm sure you know this, but Jesus knew that would happen and told us how to handle it.

Luke 17:1-10

1 Jesus said to his disciples: "Things that cause people to sin are bound to come, but woe to that person through whom they come. 2 It would be better for him to be thrown into the sea with a millstone tied around his neck than for him to cause one of these little ones to sin. 3 So watch yourselves.

"If your brother sins, rebuke him, and if he repents, forgive him. 4 If he sins against you seven times in a day, and seven times comes back to you and says, 'I repent,' forgive him."

5 The apostles said to the Lord, "Increase our faith!"

6 He replied, "If you have faith as small as a mustard seed, you can say to this mulberry tree, 'Be uprooted and planted in the sea,' and it will obey you. 7 "Suppose one of you had a servant plowing or looking after the sheep. Would he say to the servant when he comes in from the field, 'Come along now and sit down to eat'? 8 Would he not rather say, 'Prepare my supper, get yourself ready and wait on me while I eat and drink; after that you may eat and drink'? 9 Would he thank the servant because he did what he was told to do? 10 So you also, when you have done everything you were told to do, should say, 'We are unworthy servants; we have only done our duty.' "

Let me briefly explain this. Jesus said "if they repent" (talking about them simply confessing and saying they repent) then forgive them. And if they come back seven times a day BECAUSE THEIR ACTIONS DON'T MATCH THEIR WORDS, you're still to forgive them. In other words, it's not our role to judge whether or not someone is repentant....as Jesus goes on to explain, it's our DUTY (v10) to forgive them when they repent by simply saying so.

I'll admit that's a tough teaching. Certainly, the disciples thought so too or they wouldn't have responded with, "Increase our faith!" But even that's not an excuse. Jesus said you don't need a huge "Super Saint Sized" faith, but a faith as small as a mustard seed. In other words, it's not dependent on more faith, it's dependent upon our obedience - will we do what we're supposed to (forgive) or will we find some way to justify our unforgiveness? Will you use some excuse like...'you keep saying you're sorry but you keep doing it over and over again', or something like "I just can't do that" (i.e. I don't have enough faith)? Try it, but I don't think it will work....that option isn't open for us.

When other people do their part to confess their sins and ask forgiveness, we have no choice. We are duty bound to offer and grant them forgiveness. If not, we are now the ones who are disobedient and in need of forgiveness from God our Master.

The F-word (part 2)

The idea that forgiveness is conditional flies in the face of most of today's modern psychology, self-help, popular culture ideas. We are told all the time to "forgive and forget," to "make peace with your past" and to forgive ourselves. All great ideas but not very biblically sound. The fact that we hear these all the time is just one more testimony to how far we are from understanding what forgiveness really is (and isn't).

The conditional nature of forgiveness brought up one particular question from a number of people and that is, what do you do with people who are no longer around (dead or otherwise non-contactable)? How do you forgive them? The short answer is you don't because you can't. They cannot repent and ask forgiveness so you cannot and do not need to feel a need to forgive them.

The immediate objection is something along the lines of "Aren't we commanded to forgive others because Jesus said, 'if you do not forgive men their sins, your Father will not forgive your sins'" [Matt 6:15] What Jesus said was true, but let me ask you a question. Does Jesus forgive you, me or anybody if they don't want to be forgiven, if they don't want their sins covered, removed and their guilt lifted? Think this through, because if you think the answer is yes, then all people are saved apart from any faith, profession, or trust in Jesus Christ and His death - whether they want to be or not.

We can't just look at that verse, but also others that tell us how to treat someone who sins against us. In Matthew 18:15-17, there is a very clear process for addressing sin and forgiveness is dependent upon repentance. Luke 17:3-4, same thing. So, still the question remains what to do about people who have sinned against us that we can no longer contact?

Mark 11:25-26 comes to mind "And when you stand praying, if you hold anything against anyone, forgive him, so that your Father in heaven may forgive you your sins. But if you do not forgive, neither will your Father who is in heaven forgive your sins." Seems pretty clear cut right? We need to forgive people whether they want it or not. Not so fast.

Jesus is talking about prayer here, and while it seems cut and dry, we can't simply dismiss what else Jesus said about dealing with someone who's sinned against us. For instance, say you've followed the steps of Matthew 18/Luke 17. You've rebuked someone for the sin they've committed against you, brought a few witnesses and even told the church and they're still unrepentant. Jesus said to treat them like an unbeliever or a pagan. Yet here in Mark people think he's saying forgive them whether they ask for it or not - whether they want it or not.

I believe Jesus is talking about having a willingness to forgive. Some might call it a forgiving spirit. In this case, forgiveness will come if and when they ask, and because you're willing, your relationship with God is OK - he'll forgive your sins because there's nothing between you and God.

A similar passage would be Matthew 5:23-24 "Therefore, if you are offering your gift at the altar and there remember that your brother has something against you, leave your gift there in front of the altar. First go and be reconciled to your brother; then come and offer your gift." Similar situation except this time YOU are the bad guy who hurt someone instead of the one who was hurt. God's desire is that you be reconciled, that your relationships be right, so He says go do that first and then your relationship with God will be clear of obstacles and interference.

So, if there's someone who's hurt you that you can't connect with, while you can't forgive them, you can have a spirit of forgiveness that keeps you in right relationship with God himself. That's all you can do and that's all you must do. Anything else is playing God and I think that position is filled already.

The F-word (part 1)

Now when I say F-word, I don't intend to insult or offend, but to draw a parallelism. The F-word is a real word with a real meaning, yet most people who use it don't understand what it actually means or don't care. To them, it's just part of the common vocabulary of the people they hang around most. Anyhow - in this case, the F-word I'm referring to is "Forgiveness"

Sunday, we started a new series on Forgiveness and we set up basecamp in Psalm 32. (listen here) In studying for this, I've come to some conclusions that I hadn't considered before as I read and re-read passages that I'd read hundreds of times before. Now we spent some time looking at what forgiveness isn't - it isn't easy or just apologizing, it's not excusing or accepting sin, it's not forgetting (despite the saying 'forgive and forget'), not a feeling and it's not primarily for our benefit (when we forgive). Forgiveness is simply a promise not to use someone's past against them, and you can make that promise whether or not you feel like it the same way you can keep it whether or not you feel like it.

That promise is available, but not guaranteed. This was by far the most troubling thought for many - that forgiveness is conditional. Look at Ephesians 4:32 where Paul writes "Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you" Our forgiveness of others (believers here) is to be modeled after God's forgiveness of us through Christ. Since that's the case, we know that all who call on the Lord will be saved, they'll be forgiven, but there are some who call, who won't repent, who won't believe and they won't be forgiven. Not because forgiveness wasn't offered, but because the conditions weren't met.

Another example: Luke 17:3-4 "Pay attention to yourselves! IF your brother sins, rebuke him, and IF he repents, forgive him, and IF he sins against you seven times in the day, and turns to you seven times, saying, 'I repent,' you must forgive him." Well what if he doesn't? Then there's no forgiveness for him. No need for you to feel guilty or to 'forgive him anyway,' because you can't. You can be willing, but you can't actually forgive someone who refuses to admit they're wrong (confess), intend to never do it again (repent) and desires your forgiveness.

When Jesus prayed in Luke 23:24 "...Father, forgive them, for they do not know what they are doing..." He wasn't forgiving them. If all He had to do was say "I forgive you" why was He hanging on the cross about to die? He was making things right with God saying in effect, "I'm willing to forgive those who will admit they were wrong - Father, please bring them to that point."

Romans 2:4 says it's that "God's kindness is meant to lead you to repentance" and the prayer Jesus said was answered after His death when Peter was speaking to the people at Pentecost. He said, "God has made this Jesus, whom you crucified,(notice the rebuke) both Lord and Christ." and the people responded "what shall we do?" and Peter said, "REPENT and be baptized, every one of you, in the name of Jesus Christ for the forgiveness of your sins." [see Acts 2:36-38] Forgiveness came AFTER repentance. It was conditional then, and it's conditional now.

Welcome Home

We had a great vacation these last couple weeks and just got back. Figured I'd share what the loved ones we left behind did to welcome us home. They redecorated our house in Post-it Notes. Lots and lots of Post-it Notes all over.

And just FYI - I'm trying to figure out how to stop the autoplay on the videos from OnePrayer - it can get a little annoying now that there's 4 on this page.

Lucky for them, they're right - He does

I thought this was pretty creative (slightly scary, but creative nonetheless)

The Discovery Church logo recreated on my bedroom wall

The beauty of my newly redone living room

Now trying to get back into the swing of things it's what's killing me. I'm loving the iPhone, but still getting used to it and don't have my email set up on it because it's supposed to be changing but I can't get it to set up on my Mac first so don't want to mess up the iPhone. Once it's all going I'll be more productive than ever.

One Prayer - Week 4

Today we heard from a wonderful man of God - Francis Chan. Pastor of Cornerstone Church in Semi Valley, CA. How often have we forgotten the truth about God - that He is strong enough. Like Steven Furtick said in week one, God is Great. It's been a blessing to partner with nearly 2,000 churches and 1 million people in OnePrayer this year. If you missed the message, here it is.

Just press the PLAY button