Friday, September 26, 2008

Death Sentence

So it's Friday, been a long and trying week, I'm behind on stuff and have a PARTnership Class to teach tomorrow so books need to be printed, notesheets and programs for Sunday need to be printed still and a few other things. Well the printer that is possessed and decides where and when to print has decided not to even accept paper anymore. So nothing gets printed.

Therefore, by the power vested in me, I'm tempted to the point of most likely making this a reality. The printer is hereby sentenced to Death by Dropping from at least the 7th story (seven being a nice Biblical sounding number and all). Unless someone wants to try to intervene and file a petition or seek a stay, the sentence is most likely to be carried out in short order. I'll keep you posted and make the video available here for those with voyeuristic tendencies. Of course we only video to make sure proper procedures are followed and the printer does not suffer in any cruel or unusual way (yeah right!)

The guilty printer that has been sentenced to death
(I'm actually looking forward to it.
Does that make me a bad person?
How about a bad Pastor?)

9 comments:

Anonymous said...

you could sell it on ebay as "slightly used"...

Derick Shipley said...

You need to kill it off some how during a service. You have talked about it during service a couple times so it's only fitting it gets destroyed during that. I am sure we can come up with some interesting method of doing it.

There are some great ideas on here....

http://www.cartridgesave.co.uk/news/25-ways-to-destroy-your-old-printer/

Jim Bird said...

Uh... Here's the thing: Seven is a Biblical number, but generally considered the "number of completion"— 7 days of creation (FINE- 6+1), 7 feast days,etc. 10 is the number of judgment— 10 plagues, 10 commandments,etc., so if you want to sentence it to death, I really think you need at least a 10 story fall.

ASEAN said...

thou shalt not murder... but im guessing that was addressed to people not things...and also...thou shalt love thy neighbor as thyself...but a printer isnt really a neighbor...so...GO FOR IT!! ahh reminds me of the good ole youth days... :)

ASEAN said...

wait i was wrong...thou shall not KILL... which would involve murder...but yea

Jason Ebeling said...

Jim, I like how you're thinking.....10 stories in Greenville might not be easy to find though.

Shipley, I'll consider other options but am still partial to a purposeful push over the edge of a tall building.

e said...

you're funny. :)

The Nassars said...

This post is getting more comments than most of your other blogs... I think "printer hatred" is running rampant in our society!!

e said...

i find you less funny after your shirt comment, but still somewhat amusing.